On this year’s March Madness trip we had an interesting cast of characters.  Myself, “44”, and Hollywood are the core members of this annual trip.  We really enjoy analyzing the teams, watching all of the games and betting too many of them.  It’s a trip that we really immerse ourselves into the action.

Unfortunately this year we added some different guys to the mix and the results were mixed at best.  The group was all over the map with one of the guys coming off of a divorce and looking to make up for lost time.  We had another guy who just wanted to golf and really nothing else.  And then we had this guy Mike (Moose) who fancied himself as a Vegas pro since he had been a couple of times before.  Now normally this would have been a great thing.  44 and I welcome the opportunity to have someone added to the mix that can fill in the gaps in the itinerary.  The problem is that there were none.  We had the rooms and meals more than covered so there was really no need to do anything else.  But that’s not what happened.

So Moose had his heart set on seeing Danny Gans.  He was told by a good buddy that this guy was amazing.  He basically browbeat the group into seeing the “Entertainer of the Year”, but what year or even what decade no one knows.  Well we headed over to the Mirage and decided to give it a shot since Moose already plunked down the money for the show on his Visa.

Now I have to say, Danny has talent.  He can do a lot of impersonations and his show basically is one long impersonation.  The only issue is that his entire set is geared toward the blue-hair crowd.  When you are still doing George Burns and Joan Rivers bits, then you know you are anything but contemporary.  It is a variety show so there is some singing (Simon Cowell would kick this guy’s ass not only for his terrible singing but for stealing his tight black t-shirt look!), some ventriloquism, and of course impersonations.  The show just didn’t have any flow and the transitions between bits were just not there.

Basically this is an “old” Vegas style show, much in the same vain as Wayne Newton (note: We have seen him too and it was just sad.  Please don’t spend that money either!).  Thankfully Moose sat on the end of our row and couldn’t hear or see anything that was being said by us.  We were dying.  I actually left to go to the bathroom about halfway through and I debated even coming back.  Well I did come back, but I stood in the entryway with the usher who was in love with Danny.  It was a little eerie.

So there you have it.  A show with no real flow with a guy who has some talent but is far from the most entertaining show you could see on any given night on the strip.  Personally I would recommend any Cirque du Soleil show over this one in a heartbeat, but you might want to have subject matter for constant jokes over the course of your trip.  If that’s the case than it’s Dan-tastic!

I am not a very spiritual guy by any means; however I am a big believer in Karma.

There are so many things that happen in Vegas that simply can not be explained in any other way than Karma.  There is almost always a guy who has a completely negative attitude at the Blackjack table and just loses constantly.  He is cursing and generally unhappy.  Then the bubbly Coed sits down at the table and proceeds to win 5 in a row and she is stoked.  He is still sour, rude, and generally unpleasant yet she is having the time of her life.  Karma.

So I have a philosophy that even old “44” has picked up on; and that’s tipping.  I mean tipping everyone who does anything for you while you are in Vegas.

I know that there will be some resistance to this, because why in the world is the cab stand guy deserving of anything when he just whistles for a cab and throws you in?  Well I don’t know other than it’s a dollar, and you will get great service.  $1 goes so far that you will be amazed at how people’s faces light up when you tip and thank them for providing you with a drink; some change; or even a pay out.

Here is a quick run down of who and what you should be tipping while you are in Vegas (not a definitive list by any means, feel free to expand when necessary):

Cab Driver – $2 per trip

Taxi Stand Guy – $1 again it doesn’t feel right at first, but do it

Bell Stand Guy – $1 per bag

Waiter –  20-30%, depending on your level of service

BJ Dealer –  $1 tips on your bet when you can, varies with play

Cocktail Server – $1 per drink, if you don’t you will go thirsty!

Maid – $2 per night/person, they clean your toilet, `nuff said

Casino Cashier – $1 when you are cashing your winnings, why not?

Front Desk – $20 if they upgrade you, but probably won’t take it.

Casino Host – $50-? if you have one then you’re a balla; tip like one.

I will leave you with a nugget that actually convinced “44” that this is the way.  Every year a couple of us go out to bet college basketball during March Madness.  We are betting a ton of games and I am winning more than I am losing at this point.  We are at the MGM sportsbook and I am cashing my tickets in with the same two ladies all day.  I tip every time I cash in a winner and chat them up all the while.  Well on 3 different occasions over the course of the day I was overpaid by $50, $100, and then $50 again.  They were honest mistakes I think, but every time I was at the window they would scan the tickets, be happy for me winning, we would chit chat, I would get my tip out for them, and then collect the money.   Only one of them would count my money back to me, and she just counted it out incorrectly.  The other just game me my winnings and that was that.  There is so much money going in and out during that first weekend of games that I am sure it’s hard to keep up with all of the small timers like me, but it’s nice when people make “mistakes” in your favor.  True Story.

Like I have been told by countless dealers, “this is not my money and I would rather see you take it then the house.”  Don’t even get me started about what goes on at the Blackjack tables. 

So do the right thing every time and good things will happen to you too!

I have to say that I am one of the luckiest guys in the world.  The fact that Lori loves everything I do (Gators, Lakers, Johnnie Walker, and of course Vegas) makes life that much easier.

She happens to be a great poker player as well, which makes for great trips to Vegas where we do nothing but play poker.  We just went there two weeks ago to play in a couple of daily tourneys as a warm up for the WSOP trip that we will be going on early next month.  I will be posting throughout that trip, but here is a quick review to wet the palate.

Caesars Palace $300+$30 (Saturday @ Noon)

The poker room is located through the sportsbook and is fairly large.  The tournament area is actually a separate room altogether and has recently been redone since they held a WSOP circuit event earlier in the year.

The chairs, tables and general atmosphere are all top notch.  Oddly though they don’t have automatic shufflers which isn’t terrible per say, but you don’t get as many hands in per round.

Personnel is always key in every well run tournament, and these guys are good.  The dealers are efficient and knowledgeable and move the games along nicely.  Both food and beverage service is good; however the woman running food was a bit elderly and ornery.  Loved her.

You start with $10k worth of chips and there are 40 minute levels, so the play is nice and long.  I will spare you the bad beat stories, but I will point out that both Lori and I got bounced with QQ.  There is no justice.

The Venetian $130 +$20 (Sunday @ Noon)

The poker room in the Venetian is right next to the escalators leading up to the main entrance of the casino.  It’s very open and has a comfortable feel to it.

The chairs at the Venetian are a bit more “comfy” (Lori’s favorite descriptor) with more cushion and wheels.  This is key when you reach the 4th hour of a 9 hour tourney.

The dealers and floor personnel are solid; although there was almost a mutiny when the main floor guy turned off the Lakers/Jazz game right at the moment of the final shot which ultimately went to overtime.  The Lakers blew the game in OT, but they soldiered on and closed out the series in 6.  But I digress…

One of the nicest amenities of any poker room in Vegas is the Venetian water, which is bottled Fiji water.  They pass it out like candy, and it’s just a bit nicer than your normal purified water that you will get out on the casino floor.  Very Choice.

Nothing great to report other than I got out kicked on my set in a three way early on and then donked the rest of my chips off when this incredible Magoo woke up with KK.  Lori of course just had her AA cracked by a set of K’s with the last coming on the river.  Solid.

So over all I would have to say that the Venetian was the overall better experience.  They have a $500+$50 on Saturdays that is normally pretty good, but that’s for another post.

Pictures provided by www.allvegaspoker.com.  We forgot our camera.

And one is not money, what would you need?  I know that it seems like you would only need the God given ability to consume mass quantities of alcohol without losing your cookies, but believe me you need more.

Every trip to Vegas is going to necessitate 3 basic items, and no it is not food, shelter, and security (although you might leave Vegas wondering if you will even have those basic of needs when you get back home).

Very simply you need the following:

Water

You don’t even realize how easy it is to get dehydrated.  Just being outside and walking from casino to casino will sap all of the moisture out of your system.  This is even more of an issue if you come from a place that has some humidity as your body will not be accustomed to the dry heat.  In the summer it’s like a convection oven; stifling.  Your best friend is the bottle of water that you will have to have by your side at just about all times.  You will spend more on water than you would normally spend on vacation per say, but it will be worth it because the alternative is just a zombie like feeling that is only compounded with the constant boozing that you most certainly will be doing. Water first, Water later, and Water often.

Lip Balm

This is related to the dehydration situation stated above, but it’s more of a specific problem when it comes to your luscious lips.  I have seen guys with lips that are so chapped that they have spilt them open off of their bottled beer.  Not Pretty.  Girls are less susceptible to this because of the constant application of lip gloss, but still it’s a good item to have on hand.

Good Shoes

This is tremendously important because you will do more walking than you normally do.  Throw in the fact that you will have your “going out” gear on most nights and you have a recipe for some barking dogs come morning time.  I know you think that Planet Hollywood is close to Bally’s, but believe me there is some walking involved and if you are in some heels, you will be feeling it.  Lori has learned this lesson over the years and has since purchased “cute” heels that are also very comfortable.  This means that yours truly doesn’t have to worry that every step will cause some sort of major damage and that the mood will not turn south because of some busting bunions.  If you don’t adhere to this item, you will find yourself in a lot of cab lines when you are with the ladies.

So there you have it.  Sure you need a nice bankroll, a decent room, and some adult beverages to get the party started; but let’s face it you already have those things going for you.  Just don’t forget these 3 essential items that will keep you in the game longer and refreshed for the next day when you will lace them up and do it all again!

It seems like such a non issue, but your interaction with your blackjack dealer is critical.  They can certainly make a tough session easier and a great session even better. 

I have another post on Karma that I am cooking up, but I can tell you that a properly toked (tipped) dealer can certainly make a difference in your session.  I can not tell you how many times I have been overpaid, paid on a tie, or just paid on a loss by a dealer who was looking out for yours truly.

Now I am not saying that they are actively trying to get fired, or that I am running some confidence game with a ring of dealers in Vegas or anything.  That’s just not the case.

What I can say is that I have made eye contact with a dealer on a number of occasions as they made a simple mistake, and they just keep moving the game forward.  You see, they don’t care if you take every last chip from their tray.  It’s not their money, and many of them will tell you just that.  So think of it as a bank error in your favor, just like in the monopoly game of your youth.  Only this time its real money and it’s nice when it happens to you.

I can also tell you how many times I have been shorted; and that would be only once.  It was an honest mistake and we had moved on to the next hand when someone else mentioned it.  The dealer felt terrible and wanted to roll the game back and called the pit boss over and everything.  I told her it was fine and that things happen, and they do.  But I can honestly say they are much more likely to benefit you than not.

Of course it helps if you are tipping like you should (more on that in another post) and if you are at a table with a dealer that is friendly and engaging.  So let’s get to it!

5. Caesars Palace –

We play in the “old” pit in the Forum Casino near the hotel registration area.  This is where you have the best odds for playing and the dealers are generally much older and are really the salt of the earth.  A lot of them have been dealing for years and many of them have stories of Vegas from “back in the day”.  I have had many great times in this pit just listening to some vintage Vegas vets turn a card or two.

4. New York New York–

This used to be a young a hip place to play that was a bit too smoky at times.  That was fine because the dealers were fun and we used to pull a lot of money off of the tables.  However they are currently going through a renovation and everything looks like crap right now.  There is almost no gaming floor left, and they didn’t have a lot to start with.  Hopefully they can make a comeback for next year’s poll, but as of right now they are 4th purely on legacy.

3. The Venetian –

As our level of play has increase over the years, we have found ourselves playing more and more in the Venetian, which is a good thing.  There are so many tables that you never have to hunt around to find a home.  They rate your play pretty well and the dealers have for the most part been great; fast when you need them to be and slow when it’s hurting.  A class act all the way.

2. Harrah’s –

This one tugs on the heart strings as you never forget your first.  Lori and I stayed at Harrah’s for New Year’s in 2003 and it was the right fit for us.   They had lower limits and some of the nicest dealers around.  We were in Vegas for like 6 days (way too long when you have no concept of money management) and they all knew us on the 2nd day by name.  Lori was actually sick that trip and I still remember Arlene asking me about how Lori was feeling.  It was startling and I remember her to this day, some 5 years and 30+ Vegas trips ago.

1. Wynn – 

Now I don’t think that I have won a dime at the casino from the moment it has opened, but I love playing there.  Everyone (and I mean everyone) is so damn nice that you just want to kill yourself.  Everything just smells good and everyone looks good.  Not that it should matter, but a well put together dealer just sets the mood just right.

So there you have it.  Lori and I don’t play downtown or at local casinos so it’s not a definitive list by any means.  But for the average Vegas visitor going to the strip, you can not beat the group for the best dealer experience around.

Remember, results may vary and check with your doctor before starting any vigorous activity.